Synthetic everything

Up here,

everything is fake.

Everything is synthesized,

out of a bag,

3D printed,

made out of whatever it is that sort of thing

is even made out of.

When I got sent up to space,

it wasn’t because I was the smartest

or the strongest or the fastest or bravest

or the best at anything.

Being plucked out of a crowd

meant

I wasn’t even the luckiest.

When I was a kid, my father told me

don’t come first

don’t come last

don’t volunteer.

I’m sure he would add don’t get drafted to that list.

But what are you gonna do?

Can’t have a real military without soldiers,

and anyone can be a soldier if they’re called a soldier. 

That’s just how things are

now that it’s about spaceships

and about lasers

and rockets

and aliens

and existential panic.

Everyone—whatever that means—says it’s never been like this before,

but I remember

it was like this when the plague came.

I bet it was like this when settlers invaded, too, 

driving away

and enslaving

and murdering

people who’d called the land home before time was time.

That was always different, everyone said. 

But we know how it always is:

nothing is real 

nothing is true

until it’s happening to you.

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Do you believe?

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My third surgery